Romeo And Juliet - with commentary

Simply because, as my friend Kailash says, I'm "weird," have I decided to share this joke with you. I came up with this during whichever English class in high school I had to read Romeo and Juliet in. I know that this is not an exact replication of what was said in the "window" scene, but it's close enough and damnit it's funny! This is what Romeo thinks in response to Juliet's famous monologue.


[Juliet] O Romeo, Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo?

[Romeo] Down here in the bushes.

[Juliet] Deny thy father and refuse thy name...

[Romeo] I can't. He'd cut off my allowance.

[Juliet] 'Tis but thy name that is my enemy...What's in a name?

[Romeo] Uhh... letters?

[Juliet] that which we call a rose By any other name would smell as sweet;

[Romeo] Probably, but it wouldn't sell as well at Valentines Day.

[Juliet] Romeo would, by any other name, still not be Romeo.

[Romeo] No. He'd be Bill or Bob or Jack.

Well, that's enough silliness for now. Shakespeare is probably rolling over in his grave right now because of what I've done to his work.

Posted byJ. R. Guinness at 2:19 PM 0 comments  

Non-Risk Aversive Personality

The title of this post has been used to describe me more than once. I can see why. On Thursday I piloted an aircraft for the first time. It was one of these:


Cessna 152. Picture courtesy of AeroTraderOnline.Com.

This is a Cessna 152 single propeller airplane. The cockpit on it is smaller than the front seat of a Honda. I was able to taxi the airplane, take off, and do several turns, climbs, and dives. I have to say that it was ana amazing experience for me. I think that I'm hooked. If I could, I would fly every day.

That's only part of something larger. I love doing things if there is a certain amount of risk involved. And every time that I do, I am reminded, by my mother, of the time when she caught me walking out into the back yard with a sheet in my hands because I was going to parachute off of the roof. There is a saying that I try to live my life by:
"The goal of life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "...holy shit...what a ride!"
This is my motto and I try to live up to it as well as I can. Don't be afraid of what life has to offer. Take it and run. Try new things, expand your horizons, but most importantly live life. Don't just coast along, get in the driver's seat and head somewhere that you have never been.

And so, with that being said, I would like to leave you with the words of a famous poem:

High Flight


Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds - and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of - wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov'ring there
I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air.
Up, up the long delirious, burning blue,
I've topped the windswept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or even eagle flew -
And, while with silent lifting mind I've trod
The high untresspassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand and touched the face of God.

Pilot Officer Gillespie Magee
No 412 squadron, RCAF
Killed 11 December 1941

Posted byJ. R. Guinness at 10:54 AM 0 comments  

B.C. & A.D. vs. B.C.E. & C.E.

Today, I'm going to take some time to rip into the academes of the world. Specifically, the ones that thought that it was a great idea to shift from using the initials B.C. & A.D. to using the perfunctory B.C.E. & C.E. For those of you who do not know, B.C. stands for Before Christ and A.D. is Anno Domini, which means "Year of our Lord." Whoever these liberal softies are that didn't want anyone offended by that, chose to change it to Before the Common Era (B.C.E.) and subsequently Common Era (C.E.).

A little background on the whole BC/AD numbering system. According to Wikipedia.org.

"in 525, the Anno Domini system was invented, which counted the years of the Julian calendar from the year of Jesus' birth. The transition by the Western Christian church to the Gregorian calendar, which was promulgated in 1582, corrected seasonal errors due to an incorrect leap year system, though this correction left the numbering of the years intact."
So, we see that Christianity has had a major part in affecting how we keep our records. But I have a question to put to all of those academics and non-Christians who want to change how things have been done for nearly 1500 years. "What secular event happened and was so important 2,005 years ago that it should mark the beginning of the Common Era?" Jesus' birth was estimated to be between 7 and 4 years BC. IF you ask me, then I think that we should mark the beginning of the Common Era as when the Dark Ages ended sometime in the 14th century. Or we could possibly use the period of The Enlightenment in the 18th century. That would be a more common era than starting out the C.E. at year 1.

Posted byJ. R. Guinness at 10:28 AM 0 comments  

San Francisco messes up again. (Potentially)

If you haven't heard about this, then you should. Some influential political people in San Francisco want to ban the ownership of a handgun within the city limits of the city on the bay. The proposed legislation would require handgun owners to turn over their weapons within 90 days or face penalties.

Am I hearing this correctly? San Francisco, the city that illegally issued marriage licenses to gay couples last year because they tthought that their Constitutional rights were being violated, now wants to delete the second ammendment from their city? Talk about a double standard. Let's take a quick look at that hallowed document:

Article [II.]
A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

Link to ammendments.

I don't know about you but I think that the ammendment clearly states that the government shall not mess with the right of the people to have guns. And since the first section of the 14th ammendment also clearly states:
Article [XIV.]
All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.
That means that the city of San Francisco, in the state of California cannot take away the people's right to have guns.

Now, I know that a lot of you think that the 2nd ammendment should only apply to rifles and shotguns. Hell, even Bill Barnes of the Committee to Ban Handgun Violence has been quoted as saying "We're not saying you shouldn't have a rifle or a shotgun if you want to go hunting." However I would like to remind all of you that when the Constitution and it's ammendments were ratified, the ownership of a handgun was a very common practice. I don't see anywhere in the 2nd ammendment that says "except for handguns." What I do see is "the right to keep and bear arms." That includes sidearms as well as firearms.

Any attempt to curtail this baic freedom is an attempt to curtail all freedoms and should be met with disdain and contempt.

Posted byJ. R. Guinness at 10:59 AM 0 comments  

Death of a Playwright.

At the age of 89 years, playwright Arthur Miller died today. As you well know, Miller brought the world such works as "Death of A Salesman" and "The Crucible." Both of these works have been influential on American theatre and life. Besides the two major works mentioned before, Miller wrote many plays and even some fiction and non-fiction work.

Miller was also married to actress Norma Jean Mortensen, commonly known as Marilyn Monroe.

All of us have been touched by Mr. Miller's work. Maybe you had to read it for a high school or college class. Maybe, like me, you performed in a production of one of his plays. But all of us are familiar with this man and his work and we are all poorer for having lost him. God be with you Mr. Miller.

Posted byJ. R. Guinness at 10:20 AM 0 comments  

Kryptonians Rethought.

As many of you who know me are aware, I am a huge fan of Superman and all that makes up this legend/mythos/whatever. That's not to say that I myself am huge, but that my enthusiasm for almost all things Superman is great. But I digress. So, when I read this I was amazed:

In most of the presentations and re-imaginations of Superman's origin, it is made clear that the Kryptonians are well aware of what effects Earth's yellow sun will have on baby Kal-El. Indeed, that's usually the excuse for why he goes there. They know he'll be "safe" because nothing can hurt him there.

And that's all well and good, but there's a problem. Kryptonians are the assholes of space. Here's some proof...

A list of Kryptonians who are assholes:

Brainiacs 1 - 13, Doomsday, Cyborg, The Eradicator, General Zod, Quex-ul, Zaora, and Preus.

A list of Kryptonians who are nice:

Sometimes Jor-El, Superman.

And Superman's only a decent guy 'cause he was raised on Earth and knew nothing of Krypton or its people for almost half his life. When Jor-El's shown to be a nice guy, then he's acting as the exception that proves the rule.

Knowing, as we do, that Kryptonians are assholes, and highly advanced in the technologies of science, and capable of making FTL spacecraft, and live in a universe with varied and diverse intelligent life in the cosmos, we have to assume they ran into other space faring beings. Doomsday's origin tends to back this up.

If anyone on Krypton had the slightest idea that the electromagnetic radiation from an G-class star would react with their physiologies to make them effectively immortal and god-like, there wouldn't be a non-yellow star in the sky. They'd have obliterated all life from the cosmos and in the process of altering every star to fuel their unholy powers, they'd probably bring about the premature heat-death of the universe.

Seems awfully convienent that one of their scientists just happened to have an interstellar craft at the ready.

A prototype for intergalactic seeding, perhaps?

If Kryptonians were smart enough to figure out this yellow sun business, then it's safe to assume their neighbors were too. And I wonder what they'd have done with this information.

Seems awfully convienent that the symptoms of Krypton's destruction came about so suddenly. Almost like it'd been triggered artificially by outside agents?

Think about it. You're an advanced civilization. You meet these xenophobic guys in goofy robes who treat you like dirt because their stardrive goes 1% faster than light than your best stuff. During some research or information exchange, you come across an odd anomaly in their DNA that has the potential to turn each of them into incarnate gods under certain, fairly common, conditions. You know that yellow stars aren't that far from their world and it's only a matter of time before they figure this out assuming they haven't already.

The sabotage of one planet for the sake of the whole universe ain't a tough decision to make.
This was written by Brian Clevinger, the man who brings us the webcomic: Nuklear Power. I think that this is a very astute observation from a very original thinker. Either that or it's a guy who has too much free time on his hands. One way or another, he has touched upon something very interesting. I don't know why, but I find something intriguing about the possibility that the Kryptonians may be the biggest bunch of bastards in the universe. Then again, maybe I have too much free time on my hands.

Posted byJ. R. Guinness at 11:17 PM 2 comments